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Dedicated to the ale that brings us so much joy. Below, for your perusal you will find a study of the impact of Labatt 50 on the lifestyle of the Canadian Male


A lone Canadian Male and his 50. Note pleased expression.
In this case, the Canadian males in question have surrounded themselves with several 50s. Note the satisfied expressions and relaxed posture.
Here we may observe the consumption of the 50. Compare this subject with the two previous figures and note the change in expression from passive 50 proximity to active consumption.
Subject with prized beverage. Note marks from previous encounter with American beer drinkers.
50 in the social hierarchy of task-driven Canadian males. Previous studies have shown that 50 enhances the ability for rational discourse, information exchange, critical thinking and problem solving. Note clever beer insulation device employed by subject on extreme left.
The Canadian male is usually observed to be highly protective of its beer resources. Ilustrated here is the classic dimatic behaviour (threat display) of a Canadian male challenged for its 50 resources. This behaviour is generally typified by rapid arm movements, short agressive charges and prolonged bellowing. The phrase "WARWALKER" has been observed to be used by some sub-populations.
Other taxa are occasionally observed to associate with 50 drinkers. Here is a rare photograph of a Canadian drinker associated with a pride of 50 drinkers. Canadian drinkers are generally not held in high esteem by their congeners, the 50 drinkers; the club brandished by the Canadian drinker has been used for self-defence. Note that the prostrate 50 drinker has not dropped his 50, in spite of repeated blows to the head.
50 in the foraging behaviour of the Canadian male. 50 is an integral part of foraging, with extensive consumption during extended foraging episodes. Moreover, Canadian males exhibit many complex tool-making behaviours. In this case, the 50 container at the bottom left has been observed to have been used as a fish billy and a bailer.
Foraging behaviour II. Canadian males utilize 50 to aid in mastication during ingestion. The diet of most Canadian males is very high in carbohydrates; this causes their pleasing rounded appearance.
Art as 50 as Life. Artist's interpretation of the view of a 50 drinker, as seen by another 50 drinker, several bottles in.
Canadian males do occasionally overexploit their 50 resources. When this occurs they have numerous coping behaviours and will utilize alternative resources. Here, the subject uses combusted organic matter in conjunction with closely related product, "le cinquant-cinq", to mimic the effect of 50.  Further research is required to determine whether or not 55 is indeed "five better", as has been proposed by some.
The author thanks CARTA for the opportunity (if not the funding) to undertake the above research
Rob Campbell, 10-25-2000